WHO ARE YOU OUTSIDE YOUR FEARS
I am not here to advise you to be unafraid. We all feel the emotion of fear. There are things—some more than others—that terrify us all. You are entitled to feel fear. However, the question that I want to pose to you is this: who are you outside your fears. If the things that terrify you did not exist, who would you be? What would you do? I am here to encourage you to break the chains of your fears. And to walk freely into the life that you would rather live, and do the things that you would rather do if the fears did not exist. Because you can! There is a powerful you that is buried underneath your fears, and I am here to help you unearth it.
Marcus Aurelius said:
“It’s time you realized that you have something in you more powerful and miraculous than the things that affect you and make you dance like a puppet.”
And he was right.
You are more powerful than the things you fear. However, if you allow it, your fears can prevent you from living. They can set the confines for you, and create a limit in your mind of how far you can push or go. Your fears can design for you a life that you do not want, and a life that you would not choose. In the absence of fear, there is freedom. There is liberation. You are able to feel in control of your life. And you are able to focus your energy and efforts on what really matters to you. So ask yourself : who I’m I outside my fears, and take the steps to be exactly that!
5 Helpful Tips In Dealing With Fear
- Live with it. Yes, contrary to what you may be inclined to believe. The way to overcome your fear is to learn to co-exist with it. The sensation of fear is uncomfortable. It is frightening. And we all have the tendency to try to avoid it. However, by doing that you feed the fear. You help it grow. Instead, learn to sit with the emotion. Recognize the emotion as fear. Label it as such, and allow yourself to feel the discomfort. Be practical about it and do exactly what you would do if the emotion did not exist. Do what you would do if there was no voice in your head giving you a list of all that could go wrong.
- Be a mentor to yourself. In moments when you feel fear, more often than not, you know what you would like to hear. You simply wish someone else would tell it to you. So why don’t you tell it to yourself? You know how you would like to be consoled. So why don’t you console yourself?
- Think of the worst case-scenario. Again, this is another tip that sounds counter-intuitive. But by allowing yourself to think of the worst-case scenario, you help reduce the power it has over your mind. Whatever you resist, persists. There is a very high probability that the worst-case scenario will not happen. However, by actively forcing yourself not to think about it, you increase its gravity and power in your mind.
- Practice meditation, yoga or any physical Activity. These activities help center you and bring your mind to the present moment.
- Ask yourself these questions:
- Is the thing fear happening to you right now?
- Is it something you anticipate will happen in the future?
- How often have you accurately predicted the future?
- Even if you are 100% accurate that the thing you fear will happen, why rush to meet the future?
Tell yourself who you would be outside your fears, and then be exactly that!
This week’s epode is inspired by THE FEAR BOOK BY CHERI HUBER.
Stoic – The Invincible Soul is a podcast inspired by stoic philosophy. And on this episode, I break down what it means to forgive, and why you should forgive those who offend you.
Listen to more episodes of the stoic – the invincible soul podcast here!